"I am 16 going on 17"

It seems that when I am thinking of post titles a song from favorite movies pops in my head. This is the second one from The Sound of Music.

I am sixteen going on seventeen

innocent as a rose

Or we can switch some words and make it;

I am 24 going on 32 

weeks so large with twins

Sometime I think I am the only one that thinks that I am funny. 

Regardless, I am 25weeks gestation now with these little princesses. Last Wednesday was the day of the great GTT (glucose tolerance test) screening for gestational diabetes and I PASSED with a score of 133. I cannot say  how completely shocked I was to pass the test. But I am excited that I did pass so I'll take it. The Doctor measured the good old uterus at 32 cm. Bleh, sooooo big, I guess I will take it.
 The next appointment will be when I am 26 weeks. This is when I start seeing the doctor every two weeks and having a growth ultrasound once a month.  We need to make sure those babies grow about the same pace and stay healthy. It seems like, well to me anyway, that this pregnancy is just flying by. That could be a good thing, actually is very good thing.  People always think that they have nine months to prepare for baby to come but unbeknownst to them those nine months fly by so fast. There's nothing that I need to prepare for, besides giving birth, but the parents do and it is coming fast.  They have been cleaning out the man cave turning it into the twin cave, as the intended dad called it, they have been painting and buy lots of clothes in carriers and lots of other supplies. I am so excited for them to be able to take these little twins home with them and put all their preparations to use.

Happy Mothers Day

This is a very special Mothers Day for me. Not only am I a Mother to three absolutely amazing little girls who I love more than words can say but I am also a Surrogate for an amazing Mom who is  so excited to take home two amazing little girls of her own.
I know that there are a lot of people out there who think and tell me, "how can you do this, it must be so hard" or, "I would never be able to do what you are doing." Let me tell you, this has been such a blessing in my life. Nothing in my life has been as easy as this. My own pregnancies were even more uncomfortable than this. The Intended Parents are so kind, happy, excited, nervous and full of love. My husband and children are so happy and understanding and excited.
I also know God is on my side, from the beginning I always prayed that I needed him to tell me if I would not be able to do this and to stop; and if I am meant to do this then I will need his help getting through it. As a result, every step has been so easy and happy and exciting. My midwife even told me she is shocked at how much of a breeze this has been and she was expecting so much more discomfort or problems. I don't know! I would never trade this life decision for another in the entire world.
I always remember through all of my pregnancies and I remember even now an event that occurred when I was 18 years old. While I was taking a preparing for eternal marriage class at the Institute when I was going to WSU. The teacher asked the class why they wanted to have children. There were  numerous answers like; they are so cute, it will be a part of me, I want one, etc. I said, "it is what I am created for, I am a woman and my body was made to create life." Men can't have children, I can have children. That moment has always stuck with me.
I am a Mother to Sera, Leah, and Rebekah. They make me so happy with all of their accomplishments. They also make me crazy, angry, sad, tired and excited and I would not trade a single moment of it for the entire world. I am a Surro Mom to Twin Girls who will bless their Mommy (and dad) in the same way.
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY
TO ALL THE MOTHERS OUT THERE

Yesterday was plain awful

You know that song at the end of the show "Annie"
Yesterday was plain awful
You can say that again
Yesterday was plain awful
But that's
Not now
That's then

It really was not that awful. It was more hilariously embarrassing.! Everything would make me tear up. I was talking to a coworker about my children and other family members, got teary. My plans of having a hot dog at lunch were cancelled and I seriously almost cried (don't worry I got one for dinner). My 2.5 year old didn't get her medication for her asthma when I was expecting her to and I cried. My 7 year old was coached by the head team coach at gymnastics which I think is a big deal and I teared up. Then finally in the book I was reading the 18 year old girl was chosen by her boyfriend when his ex-fiancé returned and tried to rekindle that old flame, guess what, I cried.
That was then, not now.
Today is a new day and I was in a non tearful mood and happy and laughing and joking with my coworkers. My children were even super enjoyable at the end of the day 😏and it was great!!! I am sure there are plenty of other women out there who understand this amazing and emotional roller coaster.

Besides just being plain happy! I did have that 20 week appt with the amazing Dr Gundersen 2 weeks ago. Babies look great but baby A is breech so we will have to see if she flips or is set in her ways. The good old uterus measured at a whopping 27 weeks. Wow!!!! Other than that, I have murderous acid reflux which is only occasional so I started taking Zantac when needed. The next appt will be at 24 weeks which is 2 weeks from now I will do the glucose tolerance test. (No the test is not that bad. Regardless of what you mother told you when she did it 20+ years ago). I will most likely pass because I always have but until then!!!!!
HAVE A GREAT DAY

GENDER REVEAL

I am writing this post in the middle of having an ultrasound done. Mom, Dad, and big sister are here to see the little wiggle babies and find out their genders. The guesses so far are; for mom two boys, for dad one of each and for big sister the guess is also two boys.
So far we have A GIRL!!!
If we can get this little girl to roll over we could get a profile of her, otherwise she is healthy and perfect.
We got a small reprieve from her because baby B gave a perfect profile. Now back to Baby A!!!
And Baby B is a GIRL
Two little girls for my Intended Parents!! How exciting!
They are going to have so much fun with them. I should know, I have three girls of my own at home and they are just bundle of hormones and adventure.
This is a happy day
Congrats to my Intended Parents and their family.
Tomorrow is my doctors appt so we will make sure I am doing great at that point but right now babies are perfect!!!

16 weeks

So we have come to the end o of the 16th week of this pregnancy. It seems a little early but I feel the babies moving. Of course like not kicks and punches but more like pressure as they try to take up the same space. It is always such an interesting sensation to experience. I got to send the mom and dad more recordings of the babies heart beats and I know that that they enjoy it so much. I remember hearing my own babies heartbeats and the peace of mind it brought me and the happiness in my heart hearing my sweet daughters.

We are measuring the belly at about 19 weeks which is just about on for 16 week twins. Growing good!!

The next exciting point is when mom and dad make there way back to Idaho falls for the complete ultrasound. That is a very exciting point in the pregnancy because mom and dad get to see baby A and B from head to toe and count all their little fingers and toes and make sure everything has developed, see their little profiles and of course, are they boys? Girls? One of each? Well, next month they will find out!!

This is such an exciting time and I am just greatful that I am allowed to be a part of it!!!

14 Weeks (Some things normal, some things bizarre)

Five weeks ago we had an amazing Ultrasound. I say that it was amazing because I got to be in the same room as my Intended Parents for the first time. I just need to say that I thought they were amazing people via skype and text message but they are even more amazing people in person, so happy and so excited, it is like my soul has known them forever. It was fun to have the ultrasound done with them watching in aww at their little babies on the monitor. I am so excited for them!! 

Since then it has been day in and day out experiences of the average pregnancy. Mostly tired and going to bed by 8:30-9:00pm every night, nausea and the occasional vomiting, food aversions, breast tenderness, round ligament pain, and making sure that Mom and Dad know whats going on. So nothing exciting or monumental. I do, however get super excited when I have a good day and have energy and an appetite, I take advantage of it. Also, I am that stage in the pregnancy where I do not look pregnant, I just look like I am gaining weight. Even though the people around me cannot see it, I can feel the uterus growing, feels like it is a couple finger widths below my belly button, definitely bigger than a single pregnancy.

At 12 weeks I had my routine doctor appointment, now if you have had a pregnancy you know that there are more uneventful visits than there are eventful visits. At 12 weeks the Doctor listened to the heart beats and even tried to get them on the doppler at the same time, I appreciate the effort!! It was nice to be able to inform the parents that their little angels are doing good. The next visit will be at 16 weeks, which is at 2 weeks and that will again be uneventful. It is the 20 week visit in April that should be fun, and hopefully Mom and Dad can either come to or skype into.

Oh, but there are the super crazy fun part about being pregnant and that is the cracked out dreams. The last one that just threw me for a loop was a dream I had about having the babies. I took myself into the side door of a hospital and found an empty room, did my own c-section and had two little girls. Then afterwards I couldn't get anyone who works at the hospital to come close me up because on their records there was no one admitted to that room. Well duh, I let myself in a side door and the room was empty so I took it. The Intended Mom came a short while later and I helped her bundle the little girls up to go home with her and I waved goodbye to them. Then my Doctor came cruising around the corner (obviously late) and wrecked her car in the ditch. It was super weird. Almost as weird as with my last baby that I would take out and cuddle with when I wanted and then would put back when I was done. Ya, pregnancy dreams are bizarre. 

Nope

 My sister asked me a question yesterday "do you wish they were yours?"  I didn't even have to hesitate I just answered "Nope"
 15 months ago when I started this journey the goal I had in my mind was to help a couple have a family.  I knew that it will be emotional.  If we get scientific the emotions are from all those hormones surging  through your body in pregnancy. We are supposed to bond with this unborn life with a beating heart. Then, the need to bond with our newly born child once it's entered this world.
 But what my brain tells me which is beyond science itself is that I am helping create a family and these are not my biological children they belong to a beautiful couple who are the intended parents. And in my heart I can only  see the tears and emotions being happiness and joy as these children go home with their parents . So when I am asked if I wish they were mine I can't even hesitate because I know where they belong and I know what God has intended them for. So, nope they are not mine and I don't wish them to be. I wish them to belong to their mom and dad.
 In the beginning of this when I had my psych consult, which is required to be a gestational carrier, she gave me a word of advice which my husband and I thought was completely brilliant and that is that once the delivery is over and everything is all sorted out that my husband bring my own children in for me to cuddle and bond with and then my body gets what it needs to bond with something.
 I love my children there's no one else in the world I want to be my children they're beautiful and precious and they all have their own little personalities and I love my children completely. But, I'm done having children I do not feel in my heart that desire for more children  like I did before my family was complete. That urge to be baby hungry is gone I'm done so I know that it makes it even more easier for me to help those who are having a hard time or have had a hard time having a family of their own.
To my sister!  That was an excellent question, thank you !!